February 1, 2010


How to Love Him Without Losing You: How to Stop Disappearing and Start Being Yourself,” by Beverly Engel

lol… what a title. Pretty much sums up all my relationships.


I saw a new psychologist, today. [Note: Different from my psychologist from 2009 and also different from the sex addiction therapist.] She was really cool and seems to have a solid grasp on how to diagnose people.

I feel confident that she’ll know if I have anything. [aka: illnesses, disorders, etc.]

I’ve already emailed and mailed her a ton of information about myself. She thinks I do not have bipolar disorder. Which is fine with me! Haha!

For the first time in my life, I am honest with myself, so I can actually answer her questions. A year ago, I would not have known the answers.

She doesn’t know much at all about sex addiction, but she thinks I just had a rough childhood and I have self-esteem issues (which is easier to fix in therapy than a mental disorder). She doesn’t think I’m an addict.

I’m so excited and eager to learn more about myself. I’m feeling pretty optimistic. I almost always feel good after a therapy appointment.


“If you don’t like the hole you’re in, put the fucking shovel down.”
-Jeff (SAA)

Who’s driving this bus? Will I continue to let my dad drive my life?


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