Friday, May 21, 2010
PEOPLE SEEKING HELP
A 16-year-old girl called me. She was nervous. She’d found my phone number on the Monday night SAA group’s phone list. She told me she was looking for a sponsor, but I feel more comfortable if we meet as equals and friends. She lives in [a town which is 45-60 minutes away from me]. So we’ll meet before the next Monday night SAA meeting next week. Her mom will call tomorrow morning, to make sure I’m a safe person.
Last night, I met with someone who was also looking for help, in SLAA.
It feels good to help people. I feel like I’ve been where they are. I know what it’s like. I’m healthy enough to keep my boundaries in place and not take over another’s responsibilities and their problems. I feel the strength inside myself. I’m glad to help.
DRUMMING THE LIFE BACK INTO ME
I went to a small drum circle tonight, because a previous event was cancelled. [I found these things on meetup.com]. I’m so glad I went! I like the women there (there weren’t any guys). I had not planned on playing, but they gave me an instrument and I just started making different beats to go along with their drumming. It’s definitely a new hobby, especially now that I know it’s ok to make mistakes. I’m comfortable in my own skin, and I think it shows, to other people. They said I was good [at playing].
One woman by chance called me a “music teacher.” I was surprised, since I hadn’t mentioned I was interested in teaching. But somehow she picked up that “teacher vibe”—and I wasn’t telling people what to do, at all [like a teacher might do for a class]. So I thought that was kinda cool.
I feel so alive right now. I love music. And I love helping people. I love to laugh. I’m doing all of that, recently.
My confidence and self-esteem are rising. I want to live.